“Sex and the City” actress, Cynthia Nixon, strikes a nerve.
The pressure from society to fit into a prefabricated image of women is huge. Already in childhood, girls are confronted with rules, prohibitions and ideals. But no matter what you do, somehow you always seem to do something wrong. The video “Be a Lady” by Girls Girls Girls Magazine is based on a poem by Camille Rainville. The demands on women could not be more contradictory:
“Don’t show too much skin. Your skirt is too short. Your neckline is too low. You look old-fashioned. Be sexy. Be hot. Don’t be provocative. You’re sticking it out. You look like you let yourself go.”
How can you please everybody? And why should we please anybody at all? Cynthia Nixon goes on and discusses the pressures that our current ideal of beauty come with. She states: “Be a size zero. Be even less than a size zero. Be nothing. Be less than nothing”. This demand is followed by a moment of silence, a heart beat, and then a beep – the heart rate becomes flat. This image makes it very clear how far our beauty standards can take us, and alludes to the devastating consequences of beauty like anorexia or bulimia.
But the demands do not stop there. Apparently, not only do we have to meet society’s ideal of beauty, to be perfect and appear flawless, but we also have to meet men’s expectations:
“Men don’t like girls who try too hard. Men do not like ugly women. Men do not like sluts. Satisfy men. Men want what they can’t have. Don’t give yourself away. Make him work for it. Men love the chase.”
And quite honestly — How many times have we not answered Him back immediately? How many times have we left Him waiting, even though we wanted to answer Him directly? All of these ridiculous excuses and rules because we are taught that men want to conquer us and we should not make things too easy for them, or they won’t be interested.
The rules of our society go even further:
“Don’t drink too much. Do not run alone. Don’t dress like that. Don’t show too much. Do not leave your drink unattended. Go where it is well lit. Tell someone where you’re going. Hold your key like a gun. Take a self-defense course. Do not smile at strangers. Trust no one.”
Cynthia Nixon’s facial expression is increasingly charged with emotion. Her eyes look glassy, she seems angry. You can tell she’s fed up. And we are too.
Edited and translated by April Verite.